“I cut his throat.” (“Okay, he’s dead.”) “But I didn’t want to kill him!”

Nobody could ever call Sandra certain names with a straight face. Names like “brainy,” or “smart” could never be used to describe her, at least seriously. “Sentient” is even pushing it. “Slightly above dirt” pretty much sums it up. But, she’s pretty good in bed, so we put up with her. The fact that Havok, Jay and myself (and very likely others in the group) can all attest to that should tell you about her moral fibre. But we’re talking about her intelligence here, not her promiscuity.

Jay was GM-ing our first-ever Palladium RPG game. Reading the rules, Havok had become enamoured with the “Miscreant” alignment. Several others, including myself and Sandra, decided to try out some of the evil alignments for a change. It was havok, no pun intended, from the get-go.

Havok’s character had been riding Sandra’s for the last several days (not that way, get your mind out of the gutter). So Sandra decided she wanted to get back at Havok, put a little fear of the gods into his character. So, she announced one night, while her character was standing guard, that she was going to slit his character’s throat. Subtle. To Jay’s credit, he tried to give Havok’s character every chance, but she managed to make one prowl roll after the other, and eventually was standing right next to him. “I cut his throat,” she said, smirking at Havok. Jay, unable to think of anything else to do, just replied “Okay, he’s dead.” The look on Sandra’s face was remarkably reminiscent of a deer caught in the headlights, as the realization of what she’d done sunk in. “But, but,” she protested, “I DIDN’T WANT TO KILL HIM!” Evidently, Sandra felt that a slit throat would be a non-lethal wound.

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