Scorpio

Scorpio

Scorpio

(Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

ScorpioTaurus, Cancer, Libra, and Scorpio are travelling through Kansas. A tornado whisks them away to Oz. Once they figure out where they are, Taurus announces, “I’ll ask the wizard for a brain.” “Courage for me,” peeps Cancer. Libra says, “I’ll request a heart.” “Ha!” snorts Scorpio derisively. “What I want are kick-ass talents for seeing everyone’s hidden agendas, feeling rare and extreme feelings no one in the history of the world has ever experienced, and finding God through fucking.” “But you’ve already mastered all those skills,” protests Libra. “True,” says Scorpio, “but I don’t have any weaknesses that need fixing, and besides, I want to see what happens when I’m twice as much myself as I’ve ever been before.”

Diagonally parked in a parallel dimension